Lesson from Paul- I am not my own

Philippians 1:1-11
These first few verses had a lot of information in them that really challenged me. Outlined here:
   1. Partnership with the gospel in a relationship can only bring about JOY!
   2. The church at Philippi did not become weary in their commitment to the gospel...
        -"because of your partnership in the gospel from this day until now." v.6
   3. There was confidence that Christ who began a good work inside of them would bring it unto completion.

My relationship with other Christians needs to be reflective of the relationship that Paul had with this church. He had them in his heart ("no matter what, whether in chains or defending the gospel you are in my heart"). Second, he longed for them with the affection of Christ Jesus. Am I this way with fellow believers? Do I long for them with the affection of Christ? Do I look to build them up in love, or tear them down to make myself feel better?

My prayer for my fellow believers MUST be:
  "that your love my abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Christ- to the glory and praise of God." v.9-11

Father,
  May my heart be changed! I am so prideful! Give me a new heart, one like yours. On that is NOTHING apart from Christ. One that is constantly striving for Your will to be done and your GLORY to be seen throughout the NATIONS!
Your faithful servant,
Mary

How Marvelous.. How Wonderful is My Savior's Love for Me!

I stand amazed in the presence
Of Jesus the Nazarene,
And wonder how He could love me,
A sinner, condemned, unclean.
O how marvelous! O how wonderful!
And my song shall ever be:
O how marvelous! O how wonderful!
Is my Savior's love for me!
He took my sins and my sorrows,
He made them His very own;
He bore the burden to Calvary,
And suffered and died alone.
When with the ransomed in glory
His face I at last shall see,
’Twill be my joy through the ages
To sing of His love for me.


Oh how true these words are to me today. It is so sad to me how easy it is for me to get lazy and lethargic in this world. It is so easy to think of myself and live to consistently indulge myself and my wants. But, what does that ever bring? Nothing ever gets done and any satisfaction that it brings is never worth it. That is why I again come to the foot of the cross and back to the truth in this song. God took my sins and my sorrow and made them His own. He bore them on Calvary and suffered and died alone. He did this for me. He did this so that I would use my life, my possessions and my time to glorify Him and to share these truths with the world. So that one day when I see Him in glory and at last I am able to look on his face... I will have no shame in singing of his love and giving praise to His name! HE IS MY JOY. HE IS MY SONG. HE IS THE REASON I CAN FACE TOMORROW. I will sing of His love forever!! 

Not My Will...but Yours be Done

   I have been learning recently about the significance of the gospel and the sad state of our corrupt world. I have also been learning alot about the importance of obedience to our Savior and answering His call. When I became a Christian, I died to myself. I as a person no longer live. I only live to worship my King and to glorify Him here on earth. Therefore, because I no longer live, I have NO control over my life. Wherever God calls me and wherever He wants me is where I will go. Right now, I know that He has called me to be a nursing student and a "missionary" to Indianapolis. In my classes, at work, in my church, I strive to honor and glorify Him in my actions and speech. BUT, I also know that God is calling me to greater things. I know that He is calling me to obey His words in Matthew 10:5-16.

     "....do not go among the gentiles or enter any town of the Samaritans. Go rather to the lost sheep of Israel. As you go preach this message 'The Kingdom of Heaven is near'. Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse those who have leprosy, drive out demons. Freely you have received, freely give. Do not take along any gold or silver or copper in your belts; take no bag for the journey, or extra tunic or sandals or staff; for the worker is worth the keep....... I am sending you out as sheep among the wolves."

  I know that He is calling me to go and share the gospel to those in great need, to the sick, to the dying, to the despised. They so desperately need medical help as well as and MOST importantly the need to hear the good news of the GOSPEL. They need to know that God loves them.

  In light of all this, I believe that the Sudan is where God is calling me. He has placed them so deeply into my heart that every moment away feels like a moment away from home (even though I have never met them). The lives of these people and children is at stake. They NEED to hear about our Savior so desperately.

   I know that the journey before me will not be easy. I do not have any idea of the specifics or the timing. I know that no part of me wants to leave home. I do not want to leave the comforts of home or family or my dear friends. I do not want to imagine the get-togethers and birthdays that I will miss. BUT, I do know that following Christ comes at a cost. And no one ever said that it would be easy. And I have chosen to die to myself and completely live for Christ. So this is what I must do. I love my parents and my family SO very very much...but, I love my Savior and Lord Jesus Christ MORE. So,

           I will go. And as I go, I will trust. I will/am learning everyday to trust in His provision. He has never let anyone who is following Him go without any need. In His timing, and in His plan this will all happen. I will trust Him for it all. But, that does not mean that I will be foolish. I will still work when I have time and do what I can...and I know that He will provide the rest.

           I will go into areas of great danger. I will be a sheep in an area of wolves. Sudan is not necessarily a safe place always. But once again, I serve a God much bigger than that. He will keep me safe and protect me and one day when He is ready, He will call me home. "To me to live is Christ and to die is gain". This is all in God's design. I am counting on God's power to carry me through.

  I am weak, physically it does not seem that I have the strength to carry out this mission that God has given me...but in my weakness that is when His power shines.

  I am sacrificing myself and my life for the sake of those who do not know Christ. My life has been radically changed by my Savior. I am still human and I do fail, but the Lord in His merciful compassion picks me up and helps me to start again. I will go, or continue on this path until the Father points me in another way. 

Learning to Love the Wait

I know that God is calling me to work in Africa one day. I do not know if it will be long term or short term, soon or a long time away. BUT what I do know is that God is calling me to share His name and make His name famous somewhere in Africa. I believe that nursing is going to be my avenue to do that. I am hoping to visit an orphanage in Southern Sudan next summer and hopefully that will give me more guidance and a clearer direction as to His plan for me. All I do know is, the wait is very hard! It is not easy to know that children in Africa are dying every minute from HIV/AIDS, hunger, filth, and disease. So many of them are dying without ever being loved or cared for, or most importantly without ever hearing about the amazing love of our Savior Jesus Christ. When I consider this, it is so hard for me to be patient and stay in America for 2 1/2 more years to finish nursing school. BUT as always God is bigger than I am and His plan is so much greater than anything I could ever ask for or imagine! So, I will wait! I will serve in Indy with the same passion and drive that I will, Lord willing, one day have while serving in Africa. Father, I want your name to be praised and clearly shown in my life. I want you to get all the Glory in every area of my life. Thank you for blessing me with so much more than I deserve!